I came across this random photo months ago. Maybe even a year ago. I saved the photo because of what popped in my mind at first glance. I first thought, “That woman is crazy to think her “mom arm” is going to keep that kid from falling to her death.” AND “Who in their right mind would let their kid on such a thing with no seat belt or anything?” As those sentences crossed my mind, I quickly felt God fill me in on something.
“I’m in control of that child’s life, not her, or you. You have no power over me in regards to the number of days your children are on this earth. You need to learn from this, relax, and have joy in this life that I gave you.”
Talk about a reality check. Yet, how true is this?
We actually think that we, in our super human mom strength, have the power to keep our kids here on earth with us as long as we want. How did we get here though?
Has Mom Fear Always Been A Thing?
I started thinking, “Has mom fear always been or is it just something new?” I see this mom in the picture above and sure, she obviously has a little bit of fear because she has her “mom arm” across the child in hopes to protect her. However, I feel like as much as education, technology, information, and all the things are great, it’s only added fuel into the fire of Mom Fear.
We used to ride in the back of a truck bed down the road with no topper on it. Heck, I rode in the back of a truck (with a topper) all the way to the beach one year. The back seats used to not have seat belts and even though the front seat had a lap belt, my mom would still use her “mom arm” to hold me back if she had to brake super quick. We rode bikes without helmets. Sunscreen was optional and we swam without fear of dry drowning.
Do you see my point?
Somehow, some way, we have, as a society of mothers gotten ourselves to a place where we over think EVERYTHING.
What Has Changed?
So much has changed. We now live in a time that for one – we no longer trust the Lord as closely as we once did. Secondly, we live in a scientifically proven world and those scientific studies can be sent electronically via social media all over the world in a matter of moments.
Don’t get me wrong, education is a good thing but it can also, in regards to this – add weight to the load of mom fear.
Motherhood has evolved so much so, we now feel as though nothing we do it right, or safe, or best, or whatever….
You need the sun for vitamin D, yet the sun is bad, it causes cancer so you gotta wear sunscreen. BUT, you have to pick the right sunscreen. Some of the sunscreens aren’t “safe” they also cause cancer.
Processed foods are bad, they also cause cancer. Kids need to eat veggies and fruit but yet fruits and veggies are recalled all the time for bacteria contamination.
Oh, Don’t forget:
Breast milk is best – Formula is bad
Dry drowning
Electrocution while boating
Car Seat Guidelines
When to introduce peanut butter? or maybe we shouldn’t?
Vaccinate or not vaccinate?
Belly or back sleeping for baby
WebMD (need I say more)
Mass Shootings- even Walmart isn’t safe anymore
I understand awareness is supposedly for our own good. BUT, Please tell me you see my point? Please tell me you understand fellow mommas?
So, How Do We Overcome This?
Psalms 139:16 “You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.”
We have to realize, I had to realize, we (I) have no power over God.
Every single day of our children’s lives are numbered and were recorded before they took their first breath. We cannot, no matter how hard we try, worry, fret, lose sleep, fight it, try to control it, you name it – We cannot keep them here one second longer than God intended them to be here.
Furthermore, He absolutely gave us these precious gifts to protect. He didn’t however give us these precious gifts to carry around a heavy burden of fear for our life’s entirety.
God gave us a brain, use it! If it’s unsafe, if it’s the law (car seats), then let’s be smart. However, we are allowing man made “rules” and what we read as we scroll through social media to dictate all the things we do as moms. Then, we worry with our choice because sadly in this day and age, there is no right answer.
Just Do The Best You Can
I hope you know that I am totally preaching to the choir on this one. Mom fear can be a heavy load to carry around but WE CHOSE TO CARRY IT.
Nothing we do or don’t do will change the course God set out for our children. (READ THAT AGAIN)
It’s hard to accept that fact and trust – I struggle myself (on a daily basis)
Nevertheless, God is showing me a FREEDOM in Him that my control freak, only I can protect my kids mindset has kept me from experiencing for years.
Freedom over mom fear can be obtained only through Him. We must realize we are powerless in comparison to Him. He loves our children more than we could ever love them and He loves you too sweet momma. He has given you these precious babes to love, teach them about Him, and of course – protect them. However, allowing fear to dictate and steal your joy while on this journey of motherhood is not only hurting you, but your children as well.
DROP THE WEIGHT OF MOM FEAR IN JESUS NAME!
Love you friends
Erika, I know all about that mom fear. I lived it for 6 years. I was slowly and literally losing my mind. It almost killed me. I HAD to give my fear over to Him. No one around me seemed to care or understand. But God! When I finally became obedient to what He was saying to me, only then did I have peace. Yes, mom fear is very real. There is nothing we can do to protect our children or keep them here one day longer! But God can. He has a plan and we can not change that. He knows what’s best. Better than any plans we have for them. It was the hardest thing I ever done. To actually “ give” my child’s wellbeing over to someone else. But I had to accept that she wasn’t mine to begin with. God allowed me to have her. She was always His. I still worry at times. I still try to protect. But I’m the end, I learned that my mom fear was a waste of my time and His. He knew all along. I praise Him and thank Him for His goodness and peace. Yes, mom fear is very real, but it doesn’t have to be! We can and need to realize that our Father loves them more than we can ever comprehend! He’ll do a much better job! As long as we let Him! Thank you Erika, for bringing this to light. I appreciate you so much! Love you baby ♥️
Thank you for sharing this. It’s so refreshing to know other people struggle here. You are right, God can and will protect His kids. They are His anyways. Love you ❤️