Taking a deep breath, my 16-year-old self marched up to a retired lawyer, Susan, from my church and asked, “Would you be my mentor?”
Susan’s eyebrows arched in surprise and a smile spread across her lips. “What would that look like?”
“Well,” I said. “I guess studying the Bible together once a week.”
She nodded her head. “Okay, then yes.”
Twenty-two years later, my understanding of discipleship has transformed. Learning to follow Christ isn’t merely about studying the Bible together—although that can certainly transpire—but more about a lifestyle that models pursuit of Christ above all else. The Bible exhorts us to spur each other on in our faith (Heb. 10:24, 25) and for older women to invest into younger women (Titus 2:3, 4). While inviting discipleship is good, we may wrestle with how to do so practically.
Sometimes I’ve struggled to remain proactive in discipleship. Lofty ideas of what discipleship “should” look like fill my mind and prevent me from partaking in the very means God designed to sharpen my faith and build biblical community. I can convince myself I’ll do that when I have more time. Or the right circumstances.
But discipleship can’t be relegated for only those who have ample free time and no troubles. Instead, discipleship invites us to link arms together with our sisters in Christ in the messy, busy lives we have today and trust God can use our finite moments to bear fruit. Discipleship can take many forms and involves gleaning from those ahead of us, walking alongside us, and trailing behind us.
THOSE AHEAD OF US
Receiving discipleship from godly older women can feel as elusive as winning free coffee for life from our favorite café. And while it’s vital to have wise ladies speaking into our lives, sometimes our churches lack this population. Over the years, I’ve found myself in places where I had to become creative in seeking out these seasoned women of the faith. Sometimes it meant reading Christian books written by wise, godly women. Other times, I had to reach out to women no longer geographically close.
We must be intentional about what it is we’re seeking from these wiser women of faith. We likely won’t ask an older Christian to study the Bible one-on-one with us, but we may invite her over for tea to discuss parenting advice for the season of life we find ourselves, set-up a phone call to walk through a big life decision, or craft an email about an area of struggle to seek her input. We want to benefit from her faithful walk with Jesus over the years and glean from her perspective as we navigate life. Discipleship from this group may not involve weekly meetings, but continually inviting her voice to counsel us along our path. We don’t need to ask for a long-term commitment, but pursue her input along our faith journey.
THOSE WALKING ALONGSIDE US
Perhaps most surprising of the discipleship equation is peer-to-peer. We can readily grow in our faith and be sharpened by those in our same or near life season when we are intentional regarding our time. Often peer relationships are most easily accessible and can be used to deepen our faith—an “iron sharpens iron” framework (Prov. 27:17).
These peer relationships don’t necessarily need to be with close friends (but can be!), but encountered through keeping God at the center of a church relationship for a specified season of time. For example, we can invite another believer to read through a Christian book or study a book of the Bible together. This could transpire during a lunch break, after the kids are tucked in bed, or taking a walk after church. This meeting has a clear purpose and timeframe. Both people will benefit from this focused time and lives out the command to encourage one another in our faith while getting to know another church member. Additionally, once the study is over there’s no pressure to keep meeting (but you could!).
THOSE TRAILING BEHIND US
Individuals who are new to the faith tend to be the predominant image in our minds when we think about discipleship. The opportunities to invest into a new believer will ebb and flow, but we should always be on the lookout for chances to help a new believer lay a solid foundation for her faith.
This past winter I met a new believer from a former church who many members thought someone else was laying a solid biblical foundation with, but no one was actually doing so. By the time I was introduced to her, she was deep into a religious cult because someone from that cult had taken the time to regularly meet with her.
We don’t want to neglect our responsibility to disciple new believers well in their faith and often this will involve Bible study to ensure a new follower has a good understanding of the church, how to live out her life as a believer, and how to study the Bible well for herself. While we may feel tenuous about stepping into mentoring a new believer, we must be willing to do so. Be creative about carving out time—during a child’s naptime, an online meeting. Even a 30-minute time window once a week can be used by the Lord! Whatever season of life we’re in, our discipleship can match it.
I’m a fan of keeping things simple and find the Christianity Explored Ministries materials1 to be replicable, quality, and require minimal preparation. Our church leaders may also offer resources to equip us in this area.
Additionally, we don’t want to overlook teaching our children at our church or in our homes. Sixty-six percent of young adults who attended church growing up stop attending church when they leave home. We must teach how compelling Jesus is to the next generation. We cannot make anyone turn to Jesus—that’s the work of the Holy Spirit—but we want to take the discipleship of our youth seriously. We should strive to share the gospel and what it means to follow Jesus in gripping ways so the next generation catches a glimpse of His greatness.
INVITING DISCIPLESHIP
When I hear the wise counsel of a mature believer over a cup tea, I realize it was worth it to meet. When I invite a peer to read a Christian book together, I’m led into new faith conversations and deepen my bonds with my church family. And when I take the risk to disciple a younger believer, my love for the Lord flourishes like an apple orchard in the fall. As I look to those ahead, beside, and behind me, the Lord cultivates my faith in new, beautiful ways—ways I couldn’t have grown in isolation.
The Christian faith is intended to be lived out in community. When we pursue Christ through a variety of discipleship means, our church shines brightly with the gospel to the outside world and our faith is strengthened.
Let’s find sisters in Christ to invite into discipleship who are ahead of us, walking alongside us, or trailing behind us. We don’t have to do it all at once, but let’s keep pressing into discipleship.
Jenny Marcelene
About the Writer:
Jenny Marcelene spent six years living in conservative Muslim countries and desires to help parents and children catch a glimpse of how God is at work among the nations. Her publishing credits include online articles in The Gospel Coalition, Ethics & Religious Liberty Commission, Momma Theologians, Velvet Ashes, and Gospel-Centered Family. You can connect with her online by visiting her blog or on Instagram and Twitter. https://jennymarcelene.blogspot.com/?m=1
- https://christianityexplored.us/
2. https://research.lifeway.com/2019/01/15/most-teenagers-drop-out-of-church-as-young-adults/#:~:text=Two%2Dthirds%20(66%20percent),from%20Nashville%2Dbased%20Lifeway%20Research
